Assist! My colleagues suppose I am too emotional

Dear WeAreTeachers: One of my students nominated me for an inspiring teacher award last week. I didn’t expect it at all. We were at a meeting and I had to give an acceptance speech on the spot and couldn’t stop crying. In tears, I said kind words about the student and her character. The student then gave a short speech about how my class made her a better math student and fell in love with STEM. Later I felt uncomfortable because no one else was crying while he was speaking. I feel like everyone is judging me, and all I know is that they are gossiping about me being too emotional to be a teacher. What should I do? —All feelings

Dear ATF,

It sounds like you are a sensitive person who reacts strongly. There is nothing wrong with that. I happen to think that being a feeler is beneficial for a teacher. I cried ugly when reading Where the Red Fern Grows aloud, and I think in a way it gave my students permission to cry too. They’re all grown up now, and we’re still talking about them.

I spoke to Richard Kennedy, who was named Teacher of the Year at his school this year, and I love his approach: “Embrace the moment! We all express our joy in different ways. It also helps students realize that we are human when we cry. Your tears are tears of joy and nothing to be ashamed of. It is proof of your connection with the student and how phenomenal a teacher you are! “

Please do not assume that others will judge you. I can almost guarantee they won’t talk about you. So try to let go of this part.

Dear WeAreTeacher: At the beginning of the year I quit my current apprenticeship position because of my poisonous headmaster. Last month I received an oral offer from a director of a new school. He even gave me his personal cell phone number if I had any questions and I had a great chat with her manager. I then received a rejection email from the district. Nobody on the recruitment team gave me any feedback on why I switched from an oral offer to a position. I just know that at some point they spoke to my current school. I fear my current headmaster was responsible for this. What can I do to prevent this from happening again in the future? – Thrown under the bus

Dear TUTB,

Ouch! I’m so sorry that happened. I can see how you would feel blackmailed by your principal. I asked Kela Small for her thoughts on the matter as the headmistress, and she offered that perspective: “A good leader would not take a supervisor’s word and make a decision – he would contact you to resolve any concerns. So you may have avoided another toxic situation. “

To avoid this in the future, Kela shares the following: “Headmasters almost always want to talk to each other about new teachers, so it’s best to talk to your headmaster first. Even if you were a great teacher, some supervisors will be bitter when you leave school if they feel caught off guard. The next time you think about leaving, let your school principal know you’re thinking about it and ask if you can use them as a reference.

“If your headmaster agrees, you can let the new school know that it is easy to reach. If the principal does not agree, let the new school know that they may still be able to contact you, but that you would like to contact them later to resolve any concerns. You can also ask if there is someone else to speak to instead of the headmaster. “

Dear WeAreTeachers: I am friends with many of my colleagues on social media, including our school office manager. She recently posted: “What a year! The educators have worked so hard and we deserve a break. Enjoy your summer. I know I will! “My problem is that she seems to refer to herself as an educator. I got the impression that assistants weren’t considered an educator. I’ve been a class teacher for more than a decade and I just feel like that it takes away from what I do. I mean, just because you’re a hospital receptionist doesn’t mean you’re a medic. Shall I say something? —Proud educator

Dear PE,

I know it’s been a tough year where you probably didn’t feel very valued. And yes, I was upset when people like SoulCycle instructor Stacey Griffith said they were trainers to skip the COVID-19 vaccine line. But that’s very different with me.

I was talking to middle school teacher Caleb Timothy, and he had this to say: “I wonder how many times you went to the front office and saw children talking to the receptionist. How often do parents talk to this person? I can tell you that it is often enough to make this person feel like they are part of the school culture and have an impact on the life of your school community.

“You’d better just say ‘We made it through the year!’ instead of making them feel guilty. Technically, the definition of an educator is “an education administrator” – isn’t that that person? ”Even if you disagree, what good will you do with saying something?

Dear WeAreTeacher: I’ve just finished my eighth year as a fourth grade teacher and today my principal came to check me out of my classroom (I’m moving to another room). The checkout instructions said that all items should be labeled with their destination, which I did. I have a tiny room with no counter and we can’t leave boxes on the floor so I had to put things on the student desks. My headmaster stated that my room was “unacceptable” because I had to move my labeled boxes to the student desktops. I’ve been on this school site in three rooms for eight years. Every time I moved into a new room, I had to clear out trash without complaining. I’m trying not to take it personally, but that was a crushing moment. Am I overreacting? -Checked

Dear CO,

Hmm … that sounds like a “straw that broke the camel’s back”. Are you really upset because you didn’t pass the check on your till? After the year the teachers had, I wouldn’t be surprised if you just take this over the edge. It’s perfectly okay to be angry (it’s angry), but I think you need to take a deep breath and put it in context.

I spoke to Tanya Jackson, a second grade teacher, and she advised, “Try not to take it personally. You labeled the boxes to be moved where there was still space. The boxes are moved anyway. ”And she is right. They will NOT move you.

Find out what exactly your headmaster wants you to do, do it, and then enjoy your summer. You can decide that you want to provide feedback on expectations for the next year, and that’s fine.

Do you have a burning question? Send us an email at askweareteachers@weareteachers.com.

Dear WeAreTeacher:
I’m a freshman teacher who already feels like I’m on rocky ground, and now I’ve just cursed some of my 8th grade students. I was irritable and it had been a long week. Towards the end of class, I said “freaking” (which is acceptable at my school) and accidentally said “fucking”. I immediately apologized and corrected myself. One of my students said, “Too late. Can’t wait to tell my mom and she’ll email the principal. ”He said it jokingly, but I swear he could smell my fear. Is that a big deal? Should I confess or just leave it?

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